this just can’t be…..

my therapist said i need an outlet for my anger and fustration… so i decided this is it!  I’ve always liked writing, ages ago i used to write short stories and poems so here we go…….

i have so much anger…just seems like i can’t get away from it, it sticks by me like an unwanted old friend.. you know them, they never want to leave your side! so you ask…why am i angry today??? well, let me tell you.  my boyfriend drives me nuts!  i often think this really couldn’t be my life..its the Anna show..there has to be cameras around watching, this CANNOT be real life! okay back to my boyfriend… he ups and quits his job, doesn’t discuss it with me…ask my opinion or anything. i look over at the time and ask “aren’t you going to be late for work?” and he says “oh, i quit.” in my head i’m screaming and hollering..jumping up and down.. but i just turn my head and say “oh”.  does it end there.. NO!  I have the whole night to think about it and in the morning i’m so mad smoke is coming from my ears!!  so i let him have it! then he turns it to be i’m this horrible person and he’s the victim. AGH! makes me want to vomit! be a man..tell the truth and shame the devil… there are some folks that want him to quit so he quit.. with no regard for me, or our family income… i think i have the right to be PISSED OFF!

am i handling this the wrong way? is there something else i should be doing? what is it?  is it me? i just don’t understand being in a relationship where i’m the outsider.. IS THIS REALLY MY LIFE?

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